So. I doubt anyone will ever read this. But if you do and you know me, please do not tell anyone. I can't force you not to, of course; but I hope and pray that you are a good enough human being to honour my plea. Not even my mum knows about this. And I'd … Continue reading #24 – Diagnosis
"Please just go away. Just for a bit - please." I feel awful even thinking it - what kind of a friend pushes another away when they need you most? Certainly not me that's why I remain pretending it's alright pretending I don't mind acting like a counsellor acting like a carer giving sage advice … Continue reading #23 – I need a break.
Everything in life is made up of inputs and outputs. There is a certain balance, a perfect equilibrium, that weaves its way throughout each corner of the world, dainty yet heavy, fragile yet strong; upset the stasis, and things go wrong. Calories in and out, water consumed and passed, temperature rise and fall, cell death … Continue reading #22 – Equity.
It's funny how you don't notice how dependent you are on something until it's taken away. For the last month or so of my life, I have weighed myself every day. Mostly, two or three times a day, sometimes more, sometimes less, it depends. I like to keep track of it. It keeps away the … Continue reading #21 – Dependencies & Terror.
Hey guys, Again, I say "guys", but no one will read it. Lol. In some ways, I hope that no one ever reads this. It's something that I've been trying to ignore and deny for a long time, but today I've finally forced myself to acknowledge that this is an issue that I need to … Continue reading #20 – Confusions of a troubled mind.
Hey guys, Today's ramble is about my body. At the moment I'm having a hard time accepting it, and wanted to push all those thoughts onto paper. It's an extremely imperfect and personal poem - but I guess that matches my body. (Sorry for the weird underscores - I use indentation a lot in my … Continue reading #19 – My Body & Me.
Hey guys, I thought I'd start posting some of my poetry/prose ramblings. These last few weeks have been really really tough for me in terms of my mental and physical health, and today I sat down and just wrote for the first time in months. It reminded me why I used to love writing so … Continue reading #18 – Life.
Hi guys, I say that out of habit. I gave up blogging a long time ago - I'd be incredibly surprised if anyone read this. Which is kind of why I feel able to write it here. No one that I know will see it, yet it'll be out there. A warning: this post will … Continue reading #17 – Breakdown
Hey guys, So: tomorrow I'm off to America for a fortnight! It might sound like an incredible holiday to most people, but for me it's more than a little nerve wracking. Not only does a 2 week trip to America have unfortunate connotations for me due to our 2010 America trip (a long story which I'm … Continue reading #16 – Travel Terror
I'm back! Finally! Hooray! I know it's been a while (sorry!) but... (click title to expand)